Single Mom Dating at 45!

After dating off and on and some relationship fails, I made the choice to just stop. Having a young son and dating at 45 years old is a whole lot different than dating at 30. The priorities are different. The range of life experience is different. Not wanting to expose my son to a revolving door of men coming into and out of my life, not dating was a whole lot easier of a decision. Alas, it is a lonely life. This is not to say that I didn't go out at all with a man occasionally, but I never really set my heart into actually finding someone. I figured if it was meant to be that I was with someone that he would show up eventually. Fortunately, he did show up and I am now the happiest I have been in way too many years.

Dating requires a person to put themselves on display in hopes that the other person likes what they see and and what they feel when they are around you. As a single mom, when I go out I have to consider so many variables, not just for the sake of the date, but for my safety and the safety of my children and home. Unfortunately, I found that there are lots of guys that wanted nothing more than to hop into bed for a one nighter. Definitely not my scene. Though I admit, the friends with benefits thing was an option but only with someone I knew and trusted. That, however, is a cold way to go because it still leaves you alone at the end of the night, unable to hold someone or express your hopes, dreams, and love to another. Your holidays, vacations, and whatnot will still be alone. It isn't a lifestyle solution for me.

 I was content with being single at least for the duration of the time that my son would live at home. Ten more years of being alone seemed like a small sacrifice. That and it spared me the possibility of being hurt yet another time. But then I wondered if I was doing him an injustice by not letting him see me happy and with someone, other than him, that wanted to hold me and be there for me. And I wondered if I was doing my daughters a disservice by teaching them not to deal with a situation or try things even though it may not have the desired outcome. I don't want to teach them to hide in a bubble because they are afraid of the possibility of getting hurt. So when the opportunity arose, I took the chance. After five years though, it was scary.

 Thanks to a good friend (Thanks Tracey!) who hooked me up with a friend of hers from work, there is someone in my life who is respectful, loving, compassionate, funny, honest, and patient. I don't know how the future will go but it looks very promising and I'm happy. 

 Yes, it is scary and yes, it requires taking a chance. But I am sure glad I did. Now my children can see me happy and having a loving, caring, and respectful relationship! And I have someone to share my life with when the nest is empty.